“Though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil” (Psalm 23:4).
Many people assume that eating disorders are brought about by someone’s unhealthy relationship with food, because of low self-esteem, self-hatred or the desire to look like a stick-thin celebrity. Some of those things may be partly influential. But from personal experience, I can say that none of these were major factors towards the anorexia I developed. It was the infamous “voice” that so many people with eating disorders battle with. It’s not easy to describe to people who haven’t experienced it, but it happens something like this:
“The voices I heard, I heard them for years. All the time. They didn’t stop. When I slept I dreamed of war. The voices were inside me, inside my head, a piece of me, perhaps never to be gone. I was scared because I didn’t know what to do. I heard these voices telling me not to eat, so strong and convincing… They continued to fight in my head. I couldn’t remember a time they weren’t there. I was so used to it; the battle in my brain. Sometimes I thought I was crazy. If people only knew how my mind was continuously busy, thinking, rationalizing my thinking and behaviour, wondering, doubting, believing, I believed they would question my sanity”.
The Bible says, “for we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places” (Ephesians 6:12). The voice that pushes people to self-destructive behaviour and takes control over every moment of the person’s life is from the evil spiritual powers in the world. The devil prowls around like a lion seeking for someone to devour (1 Peter 5:8), to destroy life, to kill.
In the midst of this terrible darkness and evil, even when we walk through the valley of the shadow of death, we can find our way out through the light that is Jesus Christ. It doesn’t mean that the walk will be easy, but He will hold you and comfort you at every step of the journey to freedom. No matter how great your problem, sorrow, worry or fear, God is a refuge in whom you can find a safe haven: “God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble. Therefore we will not fear, even though the earth be removed, and though the mountains be carried into the midst of the sea; though its waters roar and be troubled, though the mountains shake with its swelling” (Psalm 46:1-3).
God will be your rod and staff when it gets tough, your support and your strength. He is sovereign, all-powerful, and more than able to defeat your enemies, “the Lord your God is the one that goes with you to fight for you against your enemies to give you victory” (Deuteronomy 20:4). So do not fear the terror by night, not the arrow that flies by day (Psalm 91:5), or the voices that you think will never leave you alone. Stand firm in the strength of the Lord and resist the lies of the evil one (1 Peter 5:9). Fix your eyes on the Lord and stand on the wonderful promises of God. For the Lord has “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future” (Jeremiah 29:11).
Fear not, for the Lord is with you. He will lead you beside still waters. He will refresh your soul. He will guide you along the right paths. He will comfort you. (Psalm 23:1-4).
“Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.” (Philippians 4:8).
Peace be unto you.
(Excerpt taken from: http://www.bulimia.com/client/client_pages/recovery_thevoicesiheard.cfm)
