Comfort through Creation

Posted by:Rebekah Odutola on Jun - 21 - 2012 - Filed under: Addiction,Christian eating disorder recovery,God's love -

I’ve found that the moments of greatest peace and closeness to God have been in separating myself from the world and meditating on God’s creation.  Moments like those when sitting on a rock at the top of a cold and breezy hill; gazing down at the countryside; walking slowly through the glorious rain; looking up at the stars whilst camping in Sudan; watching the sea waves roll on a wild and untamed beach.  When appreciating God’s creation, I see and experience the majesty of God.  I feel His presence and love.

In times of hardship, recovery, anguish, and absolutely in the good times too, sometimes what’s needed is an hour or two alone, hearing God speak through the work of His hands.

“The heavens are telling of the glory of God; and their expanse is declaring the work of His hands. Day to day pours forth speech, and night to night reveals knowledge.” (Psalm 19:1-2).

Here is an amazing sermon by Louie Giglio on our indescribable God and His magnificient Creation.  It’s worth taking your time to watch.

“What if the primary purpose of the universe is not to be a home for you and me…but to show off the splendour and the majesty and the greatness and the glory of the God who created it all“.

 

 

We fall down, but we get up

Posted by:Rebekah Odutola on Mar - 4 - 2012 - Filed under: Addiction,Christian eating disorder recovery,Self-esteem -

 

The above clip shows one of the most famous events of the 1992 Olympics.  Derek Redmond was competing in the 400-metre semi-final race when he tore his hamstring.  Derek would have put in years of training to take part in this momentous sporting event, but his dreams came crashing down in that one moment.  Still determined to finish the race, he got up off the floor, pushed through the pain of his injury and got a standing ovation from the crowd as he crossed the finishing line.  What was even more special was that Derek’s father defied security and ran onto the race-track to help his son to finish.  It was a poignant scene not only because it showed a young man’s determination, but also because it reflected the love and support of a father.

 

This is what God does daily in our lives – He carries us through.  Life brings us burdens every day which we can get weighed down by, but we aren’t alone in what we face: “Blessed be the Lord, who daily bears us up; God is our salvation” (Psalm 68:19).  God is at always our side supporting us, loving us and strengthening us to bear our burdens.

 

I’ve not always appreciated His presence when He’s picked me up from one fall or another, but He’s always been there.  I look back at the race-track of my life so far and I thank Him for carrying me through, for dusting me off when I’ve fallen, for lifting my chin up and bringing me redemption from my shame.

 

Instead of feeling dejected by our circumstances, choices or what life throws at us, we can take inspiration from the athlete Derek Redmond.  Through our pain and broken dreams, we can choose to get back up and carry on because our Heavenly Father is beside us.

 

For more on God’s love, check out: http://www.365promises.com/

 

“Even to your old age and gray hairs I am he, I am he who will sustain you. I have made you and I will carry you; I will sustain you and I will rescue you” (Isaiah 46:4).

 

 

Yes, Jesus loves you

Posted by:Rebekah Odutola on Feb - 27 - 2012 - Filed under: Addiction,Christian eating disorder recovery,God's love,Image,Loneliness,Self-esteem -

I was reading the book of Ephesians the other day and a certain verse really struck a chord with me: “Remember that at that time you were separate from Christ, excluded from citizenship in Israel and foreigners to the covenants of the promise, without hope and without God in the world” (Ephesians 2:12).  As I read it I remembered those dark, fearful, hopeless days when I did not know Jesus; when I put my trust, hope and energy into other things.  But those things never did bring me joy, peace or security. I was without hope and without God.  I looked back at those times and how God intervened in my life and saved me from destruction (even though I didn’t even ask Him into my life or know much about Him at all).  And I was overwhelmed by his mercy and love.

 

It could be addiction, fear, anxiety, paranoia, depression, insomnia, low self-esteem, lust, a difficult marriage, financial insecurity, worry about the kids, or any other thing that afflicts you daily and steals your peace.  Whatever you are burdened by, there’s nothing and no-one else in this world that will ever wholly release you from troubling thoughts other than Jesus: “Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.” (John 14:27).

 

From what I know and my testimony, there’s nothing that can fill the emptiness of the soul but Jesus.  No-one that can give perfect love like Jesus does.  No-one that can bring comfort in times of anguish like Jesus does.  No-one who has a name as powerful as Jesus.  No-one who can bring a fragmented life back together like Jesus can.  His is the sweetest name you could ever know.

 

I’d like to share this song with you.  It’s really simple, yet really powerful.  This song has strengthened me through some tough times and I hope it will bless you too.

 

Peace!

 

“Everywhere you look you see people searching for love… but they’re looking in the wrong places. God is love, and they will never find what they’re looking for until they find Him” (xxxChurch).

 

 

None one is like the Lord

Posted by:Rebekah Odutola on Jan - 23 - 2012 - Filed under: Addiction,Christian eating disorder recovery,Loneliness -

“No one is like you, O LORD; you are great, and your name is mighty in power” (Jeremiah 10:6). 

Today I heard a pastor recall the story of a German soldier who had witnessed and participated in many atrocities in the Second World War.  This soldier came home to his family at the end of the war traumatised and filled with bitterness.  Out of his anger, the soldier habitually beat his son black and blue and deprived him of the love that every child needs.  As his son grew up, he gradually came to depend on alcohol as a means to fill the emptiness in his life that had emanated from his loveless childhood.  His problem with alcohol eventually took his life, leaving his wife without a husband and his children without a father.  Though Hitler’s murderous reign ended over sixty years ago, the fallout from his regime is still causing destruction in people’s lives and families even today.  Even though he was only in power for twelve years, his actions and decisions have negatively impacted generation after generation.

 

However, the impact of Jesus Christ is greater than that of any other who has walked this earth.  He saves and redeems lives.  He builds up rather than tears down.  He gives hope to the hopeless and shines His light in the darkness.  He brings the lost from the pit of despair.  Perhaps the actions and decisions of someone else have caused you great pain, sown the seeds of bitterness within you, or pushed you to find solace in one addiction or the other.  The Lord cares about that (“You have kept count of my tossings; put my tears in your bottle” Psalm 56:8), but He doesn’t want you to remain a captive of your situation.  Jesus invites us to take all our burdens, cares and worries to Him and He will give us rest:  “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest” (Matthew 11:28).  Nobody in this life escapes trials or tough times, but the God of all comfort is there to carry us through.  He is greater than the evil in the world and the problems we face: “What, then, shall we say in response to this? If God is for us, who can be against us?” (Romans 8:31).

 

Every day I am reminded that my priorities are wrong and that I keep putting my hope in things that will never bring me continual joy or peace.  The Lord keeps pulling me back to Him and showing me that he is the true source of eternal joy and the One who fulfils all my needs.  That he is the Author and Finisher of my faith. The I Am that I Am.  The Beginning and the End.  Who was, and is, and is to come.  The Creator of the ends of the earth.  The Living Hope.  “The LORD is my rock, my fortress and my deliverer; my God is my rock, in whom I take refuge. He is my shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold” (Psalm 18:2).  There is none like the Lord.  None that satisfies or loves us as much as He does.

 

If you’ve not experienced the sweet love of the Lord or are looking to know more about the Bible, take a look at a few of the recommended links (ucb.co.uk is quite useful).

And for anyone who is feeling overwhelmed or lost, take a listen to this calming song.

 

Peace!

 

God I look to you

I won’t be overwhelmed

Give me vision to see things like you do

 

God I look to you

You’re where my help comes from

Give me wisdom

You know just what to do

 

I will love You Lord my strength
And I will love you Lord my shield
And I will love You Lord my rock
Forever all my days I will love you God

Hallelujah our God reigns
Hallelujah our God reigns
Hallelujah our God reigns
Forever all my days Hallelujah

 

Nothing without You

Posted by:Rebekah Odutola on Jan - 16 - 2012 - Filed under: Christian eating disorder recovery,God's love,Loneliness -

I had so much to write in this post today, but I just couldn’t “put pen to paper”.  I was carrying a load and had nothing within me left to say.  So I’ll let this beautiful and simple song by Michael W. Smith say it all. Peace!

 

“I was lost when you found me here
You pulled me close and held me near
And I’m a fool but still you love
I’ll be your fool for the king of love

He gave me wings so I could fly
And gave me a song to color the sky
And all I have is all from you
And all I want is all of you

It’s grace, grace
I’m nothing without you
Grace, your grace
Shines on me

And there’ve been days when I’ve walked away
Too much to carry
Nothing left to say
Forgive me Lord when I’m weak and lost
You traded heaven for a wooden cross

And all these years you’ve carried me
You’ve been my eyes when I could not see
And beauty grows in the driving rain
Your oil of gladness in the times of pain

It’s grace, your grace
I’m nothing without you
Grace, your grace
Shines on me
Your grace, your grace
I’m nothing without you…”

(p.s. Thanks to my friend, Shirley, for first introducing me to this song!)

“Why, my soul, are you downcast? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in God, for I will yet praise him, my Savior and my God” (Psalm 42:11).

When you think…

Posted by:Rebekah Odutola on Jan - 11 - 2012 - Filed under: Christian eating disorder recovery,God's truth,Image,Loneliness,Self-esteem -

There is great power in knowing the truth.  Whenever a negative thought or emotion enters your head, counteract it with Biblical truths so you don’t allow them to spiral out of control and trigger past habits.

 

When you feel rejected or unaccepted by your peers, focus your mind on the fact that: “In this the love of God was manifested toward us, that God has sent His only begotten Son into the world, that we might live through Him” (I John 4:9).  His love is the only unshakeable, pure, perfect, sacrificial, eternal, immeasurable love that we can receive.   Meditate on His love and how to please Him rather than seeking the changeable love and respect of others.

 

When you fear what other people will think or say about you know that the Creator does not want you to be conformed to, or controlled by, the pattern or worries of the world.  His greatest desire is that you should put Him first in your life, fellowship with Him, trust Him and love others as He has loved you.  “What does the LORD require of you? To act justly and to love mercy and to walk humbly with your God” (Micah 6:8).

 

When you feel insecure and worthless, reflect: “for You formed my inward parts; you covered me in my mother’s womb. I will praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; marvellous are your works, and that my soul knows very well. My frame was not hidden from You, when I was made in secret, and skillfully wrought in the lowest parts of the earth” (Psalm 139:13-15).  The Master of the universe, the heavens and the earth created you.  How precious and wonderful you are!

 

When you think you’ve got no strength left and can’t fight your eating disorder any more, realise the power of: “Greater is He that is in you than he that is in the world” (1 Thessalonians 4:4).   The power of God is greater than the issue you’re struggling with and greater than the evil that is in the world. You can overcome through faith and with the help of the Almighty.

 

Don’t allow any negative thought or emotions to control your life.  Take charge of them and fight them with God’s word.   Fix your heart and mind on the Word of God and seek His presence.   Avoid films, books, magazines, music, tv programmes or places that trigger such negative thoughts.  Turn to activities and resources that edify and encourage you, such as http://www.365promises.com/

 

“For the word of God is alive and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart” (Hebrews 4:12).

Made squalid choices?

Posted by:Rebekah Odutola on Jan - 7 - 2012 - Filed under: Christian eating disorder recovery,God's love,God's truth,Loneliness -

‘Jesus said, “It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick’ (Matthew 9:12).

“Jesus comes for sinners, for those as outcast as tax collectors and for those caught up in squalid choices and failed dreams. He comes for corporate executives, street people, superstars, farmers, hookers, addicts, IRS agents, AIDS victims, and even used-car salesmen” Brennan Manning.

 

Perhaps you’re thinking you’re too messed up to be accepted or loved by God.  That you’ve made too many wrong choices and there’s no way back.  But it doesn’t matter where you’ve come from or what you’ve done, Jesus wants to be your Savior and to be your guide till the end of time.  He’s waiting for everyone from whatever circumstances.  All He requires is belief in Him and a repentant heart.

 

Throughout the Gospel we see Jesus mixing with those in society that people didn’t expect Him to mingle with.  When the self-righteous Pharisees questioned why he was dining with the tax collectors and prostitutes, he responded:   “It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but the sick.  But go and learn what this means: ‘I desire mercy, not sacrifice.’ For I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners.” (Matthew 9:12-13). 

 

Jesus comes for those who need a saviour: for the broken, the shamed, the rejected, the humiliated, the outcasts.  Jesus told the Pharisees: “Truly I tell you, the tax collectors and the prostitutes are entering the kingdom of God ahead of you” (Matthew 21:31).  Why? Because the tax collectors and prostitutes believed in Him, and offered their broken lives to Him.  Unlike the vain, superficial piousness of the Pharisees, the tax collectors and prostitutes had faith and a genuine heart for Jesus.

 

Check out what Brennan Manning say in The Ragamuffin Gospel:

 

“Because salvation is by grace through faith, I believe that among the countless number of people standing in front of the throne and in front of the Lamb, dressed in white robes and holding palms in their hands (see Revelation 7:9), I shall see the prostitute from the Kit-Kat Ranch in Carson City, Nevada, who tearfully told me she could find no other employment to support her two-year-old son. I shall see the woman who had an abortion and is haunted by guilt and remorse but did the best she could faced with grueling alternatives; the businessman besieged with debt who sold his integrity in a series of desperate transactions; the insecure clergyman addicted to being liked, who never challenged his people from the pulpit and longed for unconditional love; the sexually abused teen molested by his father and now selling his body on the street, who, as he falls asleep each night after his last “trick,” whispers the name of the unknown God he learned about in Sunday school; the deathbed convert who for decades had his cake and ate it, broke every law of God and man, wallowed in lust, and raped the earth.

“But how?” we ask.

Then the voice says, “They have washed their robes and made them white in the blood of the Lamb.”

There they are. There we are—the multitude who so wanted to be faithful, who at times got defeated, soiled by life, and bested by trials, wearing the bloodied garments of life’s tribulations, but through it all clung to the faith”.

 

The Gospel if for you, no matter what “squalid choices” you have made.  Jesus came to save, not to condemn. He came to give life, not to destroy.  He came to take our sin and shame and nail it to Calvary’s tree. He came to shine a light into the darkness and to be a sinner’s Saviour.

 

http://www.esquire.com/features/best-and-brightest-2009/shane-claiborne-1209 A fantastic article for non-believers (though I recommend believers read it too).

http://www.multnomahemails.com/wbmlt/pdf/RagamuffinGospel-BrennanManning.pdf The first chapter of The Ragamuffin Gospel.

God offers something better

Posted by:Rebekah Odutola on Jan - 2 - 2012 - Filed under: Christian eating disorder recovery,God's love,God's truth,Self-esteem -

“But the Counsellor, the Holy Spirit, whom the Father will send in my name, will teach you all things” (John 14:26).

The anorexia that nearly took my life began, and got worse and seemingly uncontrollable, through the lies and confusion that plagued my mind.   Even at my lowest weight, I was convinced that I needed to carry on the obsessive behaviours that were killing me.  It wasn’t until I realised that it was the devil’s plan to destroy my life and relationships through those lies that I was able to recover through the power of God’s truth and love,

 

John 8:44 says that “the devil…was a murderer from the beginning, not holding to the truth, for there is no truth in him. When he lies, he speaks his native language, for he is a liar and the father of lies”.  Whatever is good, the devil wants to destroy it. Using lies he will try to convince you that God can’t help you, even that God is not real.  Perhaps he will tell you that you are unlovable or that you will never recover, trying to push you to exercise just that little bit harder and eat a little bit less until you are no more than skin and bones.

 

But regardless of what the voice in your head is telling you, what the world tells you, what the media says, or what those closest to you are saying, the truth is that God is real.  His love is everlasting and immeasurable, and He is able to heal you and give you a life of freedom from the bondage of eating disorders.  His Holy Spirit is ready, willing and waiting to strengthen you and teach you all about God’s plan and love for you.  You are safe in His hands, “for God is not the author of confusion, but of peace” (I Corinthians 14:33).

 

God will never lie to you or belittle you, for He is not a God of wickedness but one of love. He doesn’t want your every waking moment to be filled with self-destructive thoughts, but with joy and peace.  His deepest desire is communion with you because you are His beloved, because you are worth so much to Him.  Don’t believe all the lies that bring destruction, hate, or self-loathing into your life.  Trust in God, for He offers something much better: an abundant, peace-filled life, filled with hope and the promise of everlasting life.

 For those that want closer intimacy with God, I recommend the book, ‘The Secret Place’, by Dr. Dale Fife.

I also recommend a listen of this song by Kirk Franklin, Imagine Me

There’s something about Jesus

Posted by:Rebekah Odutola on Dec - 19 - 2011 - Filed under: Christian eating disorder recovery,God's love,God's truth -

“For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him” (John 3:17).

Even for those who are not followers of Christ, there is no getting away from Jesus:

“As the centuries pass, the evidence is accumulating that, measured by his effect on history, Jesus is the most influential life ever lived on this planet” (Kenneth Scott Latourette – a historian).

Such is Jesus’ power and presence that even some avid atheists admit they are immensely drawn to, and fascinated by, the person of Jesus.  For a short while, I was confused about who Jesus was (and is), even to the point of rejecting the Christian faith altogether.  But I couldn’t live without Jesus.  I had to have Him in my life.  And He wouldn’t let me go either.  Believer or unbeliever, you just can’t avoid or be unmoved by Jesus.

 

H. G. Wells declared Jesus to be “the very centre of history”.  This is quite some recognition from an unbeliever.  But Jesus is much more than the centre of human history.  He is “the Alpha and the Omega (A to Z), the Beginning and the End…who is and who was and who is to come, the Almighty” (Revelation 1:8).  He is in CONTROL of all history.  He was there in the beginning with God, before anything else existed, and through Him all things were made (John 1:3).

 

God, in His great and unfathomable compassion and love, sent the lamb of Jesus into the world as a sacrifice to take our sins on His shoulders and nail them to the cross.  As the ultimate act of love, He sent Jesus not to condemn us, but so that we may be saved and have everlasting life if we believe in Him (John 3:16-17).  He is the Light of the World, He is the Truth and He is the Life (John 14:6).

 

Eating disorders consume, torment and plunge the sufferer into darkness and despair.  But Jesus has the power to save and shine His light into the darkness.  Through His power, the plan of the evil one to destroy your life will be defeated.  Whoever follows Jesus “will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life” (John 8:12).  Jesus has the authority to defeat the darkness and lead you to an abundant life filled with peace and joy.  His light will lead you to the divine truth and will of God for your life.  Also, for those that receive and believe in Jesus’ name, they have the right to be children of God (John 1:12).  Children of a faithful, merciful, loving, gracious God who is ever-present and ever-mindful of us, who will not allow you to stumble and who is a refuge for the oppressed.

 

At this time of year when we celebrate the birth of Jesus and the coming of His light to the world, focus on Him who is more than able to defeat the darkness.  And hold onto Him.  He won’t let you go.  He loves you more than you can imagine.

 

I highly recommend the book ‘Living Jesus’ by John Pritchard for both those who don’t yet know Jesus and for believers.  Also, the DVD, ‘Indescribable’ by Louie Giglio, which you can watch on YouTube, is awe-inspiring.

Crazy in love

Posted by:Rebekah Odutola on Dec - 15 - 2011 - Filed under: Christian eating disorder recovery,God's love,God's truth -

“O Lord, you have searched me and you know me” (Psalm 139:1).

 The truth is that God is crazily in love with you. This is not the kind of love that we understand or relate to.  The love we feel for our fellow human beings is often conditional and it can become jaded through life’s circumstances and events.  God’s love is something else.  He doesn’t get tired of searching us out and loving us, no matter what.  He understands the walls we build around ourselves, and loves us enough to stick around and help us take the bricks away one at a time, if we let Him.

 

“O Lord, you have searched me and you know me. You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar. You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways. Before a word is on my tongue you know it completely, O Lord” (Psalm 139:1-4).

 

God knows everything about you.  Every evil thought or action, every good deed done in secret…God’s Spirit is there. Through the joy, and even in the toughest and bleakest times of our lives, His presence is with us: “Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence? If I go up to the heavens, you are there; if I make my bed in the depths, you are there” (Psalm 139:7-8).

 

Because of God’s vast love, He will go to any lengths to bring a lost, broken or weary sheep back into His arms.  From the depths of despair, He will seek you out with His presence:

“Suppose one of you has a hundred sheep and loses one of them.  Does he not leave the ninety-nine in the open country and go after the lost sheep until he finds it? And when he finds it he joyfully puts it on his shoulders and goes home. Then he calls his friends and neighbours together and says, ‘Rejoice with me; I have found my lost sheep.’ I tell you that in the same way there will be more rejoicing in heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety-nine persons who do not need to repent” (Luke 15:3-7).

 

God knows what you are going through and is concerned with you and your recovery.  When you are tired and don’t think you have the strength to take any more, He will put you on His shoulders and carry you through it.  He wants you to feel His love and presence and know the truth about who you are in Him.  He wants you to know that you are not an accident, but you were planned and intricately created: “for you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother’s womb. I praise you for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well” (Psalm 139:13-14).  He wants you to know that you are precious. You’re not good enough…You’ll never become anything…you’re stupid…nobody will ever love you” are just some of the lies that we may be told.  But the truth is that God has a wonderful plan for your life and His thoughts towards you outnumber the grains of sand (Psalm 139:16-18).

 

God knows you.  God loves you.  He is with you at every step.  His Spirit is always there to comfort you.  He is there to carry you.  His love for you won’t become tired.

 

“The Lord is the everlasting God, the creator of the ends of the earth. He will not grow tired or weary, and his understanding no-one can fathom.

He gives strength to the weary and increases the power of the weak. Even youths grow tired and weary, and young men stumble and fall;

but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint” (Isaiah 40:28-31). 

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